Help. It seems to be a simple matter of being willing and able to give or receive assistance wherever and whenever it is needed. However, it is not as simple as it appears.

In reality, giving and receiving help is no simple matter. It is often similar to walking through a minefield! One wrong step and boom, all hell breaks loose.

Many of us had failed when attempting to help others and have had people we trusted, use innocent-seeming assistance to manipulate and take advantage of us. On the other hand, we may be the person who has failed to assist others or has taken advantage of them.

Either way, the result is that we often connect help with a betrayal of trust. The next time someone offers us assistance, we shy away because it triggers our feelings of

hurt, anger, shame, and low-trust.

With this lovely cocktail of emotions connected to help, is it any wonder why people have a hard time giving or receiving assistance – even when they need it – including life-threatening situations?

Sometimes we are afraid to offer or receive help because we are concerned that they may become dependent on us, or we may become dependent on them. This can be resolved by taking ownership of our advice and our choices and empowering others to do the same.

The optimum or ideal relationship with help is to offer free assistance when needed and to be ready, willing and able to receive assistance when the physical intervention, advice, sharing, consulting or coaching of a subject expert could save us money, time and energy.

The purpose of this Clean Slate exercise is to provide us with a 360-degree view of our relationship to help and to enable us to give freely and receive help anytime we choose to.

This will enable us to benefit from other peoples’ wisdom, as well as enjoy the satisfaction that comes with contributing and making a difference in the lives of others.

This process can be completed alone or with a coach. The benefit of enlisting the help of a coach is that any areas where we feel stuck (or sleepy) can be worked through by the coach as well as extracting the maximum gain and improvement from the process! The coach is a trained expert who can see what we may not be able to.

Here’s to more contribution and spiraling upwards!